Merry Christmas

Jesus, Mary and Joseph left for Bethlehem on Black Friday, so they missed the big sales at the local merchant stalls. They were still traveling and were too poor to have computers, so Cyber Monday was a bust. They arrived in Bethlehem on Giving Tuesday and got the benefit of a free stable with accompanying manger.

Jesus was born the next day. The choirs of angels wanted to sing “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (which they thought Jesus would enjoy more), but they dutifully sang the Glorias. The shepherds arrived, hoping to sit on Joseph’s lap, but they settled for some quiet adoration time.

The Wise Men could have stayed home for the after-Christmas sales, trading in gold, frankincense and myrrh for some better camels and a Cuisinart. But they came ahead with their gifts, which Joseph used for a down payment on a little bungalow in Egypt.

Well, this is my best effort to bring the Christmas story in line with contemporary American values.

Merry Christmas to all!