Molly Jean

 Molly Jean Gives Advice

Dear Molly Jean:
I recently broke up with my boyfriend, but I still like him. I met a new guy I like. I ‘d like to keep them both. What should I do?
Love Dilemma

Dear Love Dilemma:
If you’re lucky, your two boyfriends will be bisexual and you will have a delightful love triangle. Give it a try.

Dear Molly Jean:
My husband likes to walk around naked, which I get tired of. And it’s not that big anyway. What should I do?
Too much.

Dear Too Much:
Take all of his dirty underwear off floor and throw it at him. If this does not work, do a little sexting to his mother.

Dear Molly Jean:
Kelly Clarkson has been at my door several times and once even forced herself into my house at dinner time. Has this happened to other patriotic Americans.
She Ate the Whole Cake

Dear She Ate the Whole Cake:
There are several easy solutions to your problem. Use bear trap at the front door. There is a little known feature of the Ring security system that shoots poison darts. Or just put arsenic in the cake.