Listen up. I’m a white male, with my white male two-day beard. I deserve Calvin Klein underwear to keep my ample white member comfy, snug and warm. And those finely tailored pants that emphasize my white male sculpted calves and firm buttocks. Need them. That guy on TV convinced me that I also need a wardrobe of uber-stylish white male Untuckit shirts. My feet. Of course, my white male feet need to be protected and supported by sneakers that are designed with new age scientific technology and decorated so everyone can get my brand.
Now I’m ready to go on dating patrol in search of a young, white, blond trophy wife to dangle on my white male arm. Wish me luck.
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