Saturday, March 24, 2018

Updated Bible stories

Updated Bible stories:
It was not a trumpet that knocked down the walls of Jericho. It was actually the East Jerusalem Junior High Pep Band that accomplished this.
David did not actually fell Goliath. David sued Goliath and the Goliath Corp. for crushing his entire grape crop with his big feet. David won and the settlement bankrupted the Goliath Corp.
Moses was not found in a basket floating on the Nile. He was left at the Safe Zone in the Cairo Kroger. The pharaoh’s daughter saw him took him home when she was shopping for dishwashing liquid.
God did not really want Abraham to sacrifice Issac. He wanted the sacrifice of a nice fat sheep because He had more recipes for cooking sheep than for cooking children.

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