Genesis

GENESIS

On the FIRST day, God said, “I will create a universe, and I will take as long as I damn well please. It may never get finished.”

On the SECOND day, God said, ”I will separate the earth from the sky, and I will make the sky so beautiful, everybody will want to go there.”

On the THIRD day, God said, “I will make all the creatures of the world, and a lot of them will be beetles. I like beetles.”

On the FOURTH day, God said, “I will give men penises and see what they do with them. Should be interesting.”

On the FIFTH day, God said, “I can trust women. I’ll give them wombs.”

On the sixth day, God said, “Now let all the species dance their way to fulfillment.”

On the SEVENTH day, God said, “I’m tired. Let’s all take a rest. And sure, you can buy alcohol today as long as it’s after 1 pm.”