--MTV music video producer:
How about this? The pop star is singing at the piano, which
is sitting in the middle of a raft full of Syrian refugees. As they approach
shore they see a fire. When they hit the shore it turns out to be a group of
young beautiful blondes in bikinis roasting marshmallows.
The refugees carry the piano ashore and begin to dance,
explaining that in fact they are survivors from a capsized cruise boat off the
California coast.
The singer finishes his song and begins to roast marshmallows
for everyone while they continue their frenzied dance.
--Assistant producer:
I love it.
--Police detective Dave is talking to his partner, Jane:
I don’t know why they gave me such an ugly partner. You’re
overweight, you have small tits and mousey brown hair. But what the hell, let’s
have sex anyway.
--Head writer on a crime show:
OK, we need a change. This episode we kill off the blondes
and the hunks and save all the men with potbellies, bald heads and bad fitting
suits.
--Prophetess to Lovely Maiden:
He’ll ride in on a white horse. He’ll have big muscles,
greasy hair, a large bloody sword, a few big scars on his face and a loin cloth
made of yak hair. In an instant, you’ll know he’s the one for you.
Lovely Maiden:
Sigh.
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