2024 requirements for teachers:
1. Each teacher must develop the voice of a TV announcer to hold students’ attention.2. Each teacher must have a real or animated class mascot.
3. Each teacher must adopt a football player hero for the class.
4. Each teacher must post a personal dance video on a social media site to indicate they are cool.
5. Each teacher must interview the parents of each child to determine their religion, politics and values so they can individualize teaching to each child.
6. For this, teachers get a 2% raise and a personal PTSD therapist.
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