Mini-sermonette #6: Your ass

Your ass is in the wrong place if:

It's in my business

It's on the couch

It's on Facebook

It's above your belt line.

Corporate America

Corporate America tells me that I can be the me I deserve to be and reach my pinnacle and be loved and admired by just wearing the right clothes, getting the right look, having the right body, exuding the right attitude. I can bling my way to fame, fortune and self-adoration. All I have to do is just do it and be all I can be. Hell, I can consume my way to happiness.

But who's telling me that compassion, sharing and community might also make me a happier, healthier person? After all, the newspaper story about these values will never be as big as the full page advertisement for more stuff.

More hot stock picks

GPS, Inc.
GPS (global politician search) is an app for your phone that allows you to collect locational coordinates and time durations on the activities of your elected representatives. If they are on a junket sponsored by a big dollar lobbyist, or on the golf course, or in a pricey DC love nest, or out of the country while purporting to be just around the corner, or talking to their lawyer about how to take care of a DUI or in an FBI sting, you'll know exactly where they are and how long they were there.

EDCenters, Inc.
This is a rapidly rising company with a chain of facilities to treat erectile dysfunction. As the population of American male baby boomers shoots up, this company is planning rapid expansion. Each patient is guaranteed skilled care by specially trained nurses. All care is hands-on and extremely sensitive to the patient's needs.

Mini-sermonette #5

Two-thirds of the world's population still lives on hardly more than $1 a day. So it's pretty likely that if you're looking for the second coming of Jesus, he would once again be born in a cave or a stable or maybe a refugee camp. And nobody would even notice.

The Ten Commnadments of Contemporary Art

 

1.              Believe in yourself.

2.              Make art that validates your belief in yourself.

3.              Don’t suck up.

4.              Acquire discipline and skill and know when to use them to best advantage.

5.              Draw.

6.              Know, respect and challenge your audience.

7.              Listen to criticism with an open mind and measure it with discernment.

8.              Maintain passion and persistence.

9.              Learn to accept rejection with grace.

10.           Make art from as deep as possible within yourself, and bring that to the viewer as

            a gift.

Recommended summer reading

First a message from the sponsor. I am trying to get as many hits as Justin Bieber's dog. Will you help me?


Good summer reads:

Puppy Lust: The Life and Times of Justin Bieber

The Biography of Joan Rivers’ Face

Flesh Pots: How to Dress for Shopping at WalMart

They All Look Like Mitch McConnell: Confessions of a DC Call Girl

50 Shades of Red: Sexting without the Proper Equipment

 

The New Ten Commandments: Version #1

1.              Search for and honor the god within you.

2.              Act with personal integrity.

3.              Respect all of creation.

4.              Make every act of love meaningful.

5.              Honor the gifts you were given.

6.              Create justice within your reach.

7.              Make the world a better place as best you can.

8.              Be a decent human being in all your actions.

9.              Forgive, and learn from, human failure in yourself and others.

10.           Make every sexual experience healing, mutually satisfying and healthy.